Having Complete Fidelity In Your Marriage

    In 1995, religious leaders from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints released a document titled, "The Family: A Proclamation to the World." In this document, there's a statement that says, "Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Now what is fidelity and what does it look like in a marriage? If you Google the definition of fidelity, it defines it as "faithfulness to a person, cause, or belief, demonstrated by continuing loyalty and support." Being faithful to a spouse seems like a pretty simple idea to understand, but what does it all entail?

    Earlier this week I read a paper on infidelity written by Scott Gardner and Christian Greiner. In this paper, I was able to receive a lot of insight into what infidelity is. Infidelity isn't just limited to not having sexual relations with another person other than your spouse, but it also includes not becoming emotionally involved with someone else.

    Now I know that sounds kinda weird, but let me explain. I'm not saying you can't have connections with friends and family members. In fact, please have a social life outside of your marriage and talk to other people! (Or you'll go insane, trust me). It's healthy to have other connections with other people but if you find yourself consistently confiding in another person other than your spouse, that's when it becomes a problem. Your spouse should be your number one source of trust and connection, not with your co-worker, neighbor, or even your sibling. It may seem harmless at first to have deep one-on-one conversations with that other person, but you'll soon find that the more that the conversations continue, the more you begin to emotionally rely on this person more than your spouse.

    When I was preparing to get married, I didn't understand the meaning of complete fidelity. I had hoped that the relationships I had with my other friends of the opposite gender would remain the same as I got married. I had become so close with these guys that they felt more like a family rather than just my friends. But I noticed that as soon as I had become engaged to my husband, some of my friends expressed their disapproval and we began to drift apart. One of the reasons why I didn't want to get married so soon was due to the fear of losing my friends but now that fear was beginning to come true. I felt sad and confused, but as time has gone by, I have begun to accept that things aren't going to be the same. I can still be friends with those same people and create other connections, but the way I approach these relationships is different than it was before I got married and that's okay.

    Even though marriage is imperfect (like everyone else's) but I have found that my husband truly is my best friend that I confide in. It's comforting to know that the same person I share my deepest feelings with shares his own deepest feelings with me as well. He is the person I got to when I need to rant, cry, and hug. As I have tried to exercise complete emotional fidelity to him, I've noticed that our bond has become stronger than it was before we had gotten married. I believe that it's not only important to stay faithfulness to your spouse on a physical level, but also on an emotional level as well. I believe that if you stay emotionally faithful to your spouse, it will become easier to resist the temptations that could potentially damage your relationship with them.